Wearable Wednesday Thom Browne


‘Kids, your Uncle Marvin has been so lonely for a long time. He’s bringing a girl to Thanksgiving and I want you all to make a special effort to be nice to her and her friends.’

‘Mom, she’s here- and Grannie Fran just accused her of trying to steal the good placemats- I think you need to come out here’

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‘Honestly Becky! I can’t leave the gravy right now! Go fill up the nut cups- what now???’

‘Ma- she’s not wearing a top- well, not on both sides-‘

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but one of them is wearing a lamp shade and maybe some tiny chickens-‘

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Stop being a brat- go show them my Elvis collectable plates and my spoons from all 50 states!’

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‘Whats Pogo so upset about? Whats all that barking? Go see!’

‘Mom- Pogo thinks her Coat Is alive- he’s cowering under the table now’

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‘Don’t keep running in here! Its rude! Go offer her an iced tea….and see if she brought the centerpiece for the table’

‘But Mom- I think she’s wearing it…’

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‘Mom- Uncle Marvin is taking the brandy and leaving without her…..’

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday ADEAM


Look into the swirling pattern effect of my Bewbs. You are getting very sleepy- you are in a deeply relaxed state. You will buy anything Vogue tells you to…….

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You even want to buy a dress with a giant oven mitt shrinky-dinked to it.

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Your mind will become open to new concepts- like capelet blouses! They will make total sense to you!

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You will give me this coat and shirty business- but keep the satyr clogs for yourself. Seriously, I want you to have them.

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You will not realize that she is trying to steal your grandmothers drapes…..

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When I count to 3 you will awake refreshed and have no idea that you now possess a tail.

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday 6397


‘Hey- I know you’re getting ready for the show, but you need to get down here.’

‘Why? Whats wrong- Scooter you sound frantic!’

‘It’s the Models sir. They refuse to put on the clothes. They’re just milling around unstyled and smelling of unfiltered cigarettes. I can’t make them get dressed!?’

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‘Wait- what?’

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‘Yeah, I know, it’s crazy! They just keep staring at me and refusing to change.’

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‘That’s ridiculous! They have contracts! I gave them diet coke!’

‘Its true! They look terrible! Like they just rolled out of bed and painted their garage or cleaned a million toilets! Just saggy grimey looking jeans and ratty slip ons!?’

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‘SCOOOTER! YOU MORON!!!! THAT IS MY COLLECTION!!!!’

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‘Um, well….they all do look comfortable…’

‘Get out, Scooter. You’ll never wrangle models in this town again.’

 

photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

 

Wearable Wednesday Alessandra Rich


Good evening and welcome to another installment of ‘Spending Grannies Money’ the reality show starring people who know that they are better than you.

‘Damn it Honoria, I know you let your $1400 cat into my climate-controlled lace closet again!’

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“whatever Enid- I was too busy having my stylist find this one of a kind belt- oh, Balzac!’

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‘What belt, Honoria? Do you mean this old thing I found under the gardener?’

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‘Diego!!! …..Enid you trollope! Well, at least you only copied the styling- I spent weeks having Carmen hand-bead this dress with stones crushed up from a gothic cathedral’

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‘Hmm…I thought that rag looked a little dowdy- so I have Carmen rip off the cheesy sleeves.You don’t need them when you spend $1800 an hour having your own Swedish trainer gently excersize the tone into them while you sleep’

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‘Now if you’ll excuse me Honoria, I’m off to systematically boff my way to Prince Harry.’

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‘Not so fast, Enid, Honoria- I need to discuss my will! Also the possibility of my leaving it all to my pool boy, Javier- who likes me braless. ‘

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Tune in again for another stirring episode where Enid buys a small island, Honoria kills a condor to have a one of a kind clutch bag made and Granny slips into something comfortable ……

 

 

photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Thomas Tait


Psst- check out their feet!!!!! It’s really  the safest place to look.

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Did he leave the models in the bath too long?

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She looks like a half eaten bag of taffy from the shore.

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This is a rejected idea for the Nutcracker- alternate ballet- Rise of the Demon Cupcake Queen

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No one ever thinks to bring their patio awnings in during a hurricane.

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Did she do something wrong? Are you punishing her?

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And they’ve brought down the checkered flag- we should have a winner announced soon!

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Babyghost


This is a test. Of your ability to focus on the clothing. Ready? Don’t be distracted by her ankle wounds that look like someone let a rabid woodchuck feast on her. Don’t . She got them crawling into the photographers window last night trying to get back her e cigarette.

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Don’t be distracted by her obvious rage at the photographer who said he’s call, but obviously he prefers that slut from Red Valentino that she saw him with last night at Butter.

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Don’t wonder if her right leg has been oddly photoshopped- she asked as a last favor for them to remove the tattoo she got of the photographer back when things were good.

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Don’t be distracted that he paused the photoshoot while another model brought him a falafel. Right in front of her. Like that wasn’t their special food truck.

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….once upon a time I was falling in love- now I’m only falling apart…..you bastard!

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Oh, my God- did he really just tell her that? He said I was like a young Elle Fanning…..

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Smile? With my eyes? The eyes that just saw you give her a grape! One of MY grapes!

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Oh, you think you’re getting these shoes back? Over my dead body. Raoul.

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photo credits:style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Hermes


I believe the cohesive theme to this collection is ‘things I have seen Jeremy Irons wear’

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See!!! I told you!

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This fabric- yes please.

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The prototype was made of legos.

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I can definitely do without the hip turban, but I love the jacket.

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I’m sorry, I can’t walk 5 feet with a towel on- how is she keeping her boyfriends henley from falling off??

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How is Grandpa supposed to fight off pneumonia if you keep stealing his happenin’ cardigans??

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After the show, the caterers took this dress with them by mistake.

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Photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.