Heidi: Today we will judge your latest efforts and as always one of you will be moving on and one of you will be out.
Me: But I’m not a contestant, I’m just making some doll clothes for a friend…..does that light have to be right in my eyes?
Nina: Lets look at the first piece. I find this a little bland- do you really understand who your client is? Do you see perhaps a professional woman in this?
Me: well, no, more of a toddler, I guess.
Michael: Never underestimate your client! They are your Lifes’s blood! It’s the kiss of death, right Colin Firth, Guest Judge?
Colin: I’m not sure why I’m here, is this Helen Mirren’s Celebrity Duck Hunt?
Heidi: lets talk about the pink one! I’d wear that. In fact, I know my husband would love me in that. It’s like a Leider-romper!
Michael: Leider-rompers are SO Halston 1995….I’m so over it- it’s like a diaper cover or something for a washer woman!
Me; Well, it is a diaper cover…
Heidi: Can I try it on? NOW?
Me; um, I guess, the crotch snaps….
Michael: Did you say snap crotch? Oy vey!
Nina: oh, daring, risky – but so derivitive of Viviene Westwood 1984- is that really what you want to say?
Michael: Snap crotch takes me back to my Studio 54 days…..
Nina: It needs editorial thought and introspective- I’m not sure where you are going with this collection
Me: I’m not really a contestant on Project Runway-
Michael: Well, not if you can’t take criticism and act like you aren’t even involved in the competition! All designers get negative reviews- not me of course, I design for Gwyneth Paltrow, but other people get bad reviews….you need to toughen up and find your muse!
Colin: Seriously, am I being paid for this?
Heidi: Anne, I think it’s obvious that you have ideas, a good work ethic, but your vision is muddled and your collection looks like it’s for an incontinent fatty. I’m sorry, but it’s ALVETERZANE!
Nina: Colin, can I get a ride to that duck hunt with you?
Colin: No. Not unless someone pays me for this.
I sure hope Bitty Baby is more understanding…..
Photo credits: Definitely NOT style.com
Pretty Grievances 
These are adorable!
LikeLike
LMAO!!!!
Cute kiddie clothes. I knew there was a reason I don’t watch Project Runway… 😉
LikeLike
They’re perfect for you real audience, I like the pink jumper the best.
LikeLike
“Snap crotch takes me back to my Studio 54 days…..” ha ha ha ha!
LikeLike
LOL! I’m sure your friend’s doll will be suitably impressed. 🙂 At least she won’t be naked….like our barbies always were…?
LikeLike
These are fabulous! The jumper is my favorite, also.
LikeLike
Lovely outfits. That was hilarious, I needed a laugh to get my day going.
LikeLike
OMG, you nailed their commentary! Best laugh I’ve had this morning. The doll clothes look adorable, and appropriate for a toddler doll so….
Hopefully the process wasn’t too arduous. I especially like the purple romper, although I’m having shudders at the thought of Michael Kors in a snap crotch. EWWWWWW.
LikeLike
Best post I’ve read in a long time. What a wonderful way to start my day!
LikeLike
What a lucky girl to get such fabulous doll clothes!!! Awesome job…they are all great.
LikeLike
I like them! Especially the purple one! Any of Reina’s dolls would love to walk the catwalk in those garments!
LikeLike
Very cute, all of them and I haven’t a fave. Oh and you really crack me up. Brilliant. Emily.
PS must look up Studio 54….. but not crotch snaps….
LikeLike
I’m new to your blog, but I’ll be back. You are too funny!
LikeLike
You are hysterically funny! It could be because it’s so close to the real thing.
Leslie
LikeLike
Nina, you must read this!
LikeLike
No, no!
LikeLike
Oh wow, you were about a year too early with this!!
LikeLike