Burda and I have a special relationship. I have a favorite babydoll dress I wear all summer and ignore how my tuckus looks in, and evertime I trot it out I think, “Oh Burda, I love you, lets look for more patterns just like you!’ and then the horror starts. Burda treats me like the guys back in high school…… ‘Oh, mama, Burda isn’t bad- just misunderstood!’ Oh, honey no. Sometimes Burda is bad. Grab a malted and hear my tale.
I’ve only seen this pattern reviewed with the long-sleeved version. I wanted something a little different and I wanted to use more of my foolish upholstery purchase of 2011, so I chose the other view. Thats when the party started.
This is when Burda started to remind me of guys I’d known. They never want to tell you what they are thinking!!! Burda 7401 just didn’t want to talk feelings with me.
Once you have put the darts in the front side piece and the back side piece, they are never mentioned or shown again, so if the written instructions are as vague as a high school boy (they are) you end up relying on the faithless pictures to guide you.
‘Meet me later, we’ll hang out’ Where, when???? Hey, will you call me???????
I read the pattern, I reread the pattern, I lit candles, I wailed and gnashed my teeth. I searched online and everyone had the same issue- so I pinned her up onto Twiggy and tried to piece it out. For some reason, I just couldn’t wrap my mind around the sleeve pieces having a dart in the front, a dart in the back and then a straight rectangle side panel separating them- distorting the shape in my mind. Am I crazy? I let Twiggy wear it for about a week and she didn’t give me any good advise. I contemplated aggressive acts upon it- I wondered how well that fabric would look as a throw pillow- a kimono sleeved throw pillow. I even tried to make it jealous by talking to other patterns, but no, it would not share its innermost feelings with me. It even cheated on me with other people! Pattern Review Ok, sure it was last year, but damn it, it still hurt!
Finally I just gave in and put that stupid side panel in and oh, look, it’s a little jacket- how fun, how cute! it’s a 2 day project turned into a week of stomping and fist shaking and questioning my sanity. Seriously, I need to be thankful that my life is so dramaless that THIS was the thing that kept me up at night. Thanks, Lord.
Photo shoot hijacked officially:
At that point I really felt that I was going to make it to the prom with this pattern, but no, that’s when I started to wonder about closure. No, not Dr Phil closures- the actual ones that keep my flesh covered. Ok, I read the instructions a 54th time. There are no instructions about closures! Are we to assume that gaudy bib necklace of old typewriter keys on the envelope is the only thing securing that top? On the back of the envelope I see a picture advising me to buy 2 snaps, but where they might best be sewn is up to the wearer. ‘Snap discretion’ is the better part of valor, I suppose. I gave it a little lapel fold and it felt a little less boxy. I like.
Welll, it is her chair.
photo credits: meadhawg, google images