Wearable Wednesday Altuzarra

I understand a collection needs a theme- I’ve seen Nina Garcia rant, I know stuff. Lets see if we can spot the themes that stood out here: Ok, now this:

Did you say angry girls needing podiatrists?  Lord, those toes are freaking me out- are model toes longer than regular peoples? Ok, I totaly digressed there.. back to the theme search-Drapery fringe! Gladiator Boots- workmans coats- I do want the coat. It features multiple snack pockets!

Hmm- well upholstered gladiators in theatrical drapes!

That’s a lot of fringe… I like this jacket, altho I just know I’ll drag my tails in my soup  too much and it will constantly be at the cleaners?! Oh, now this one simply cries out for the gladiator boots, not just these toe vents!So what do we think? Great pieces, but together? It isn’t flying for me….I’m not even sure how to get in and out of this.My cat loves all these fringes tho…she votes ‘yes’. Now in honor of the usually high level of comments- I refer to the  level of wit, of course- I will be awarding a pattern prize for the best Scarlett O’hara comment! I do love it when you all do the work for me!

photo credits: style.com

60 thoughts on “Wearable Wednesday Altuzarra

  1. Yup, sorry this is wardrobe vomit for me. It is just a whole bunch of randomness. I respect weirdness with a theme but this is just ‘all over the shop’. It’s like a teenagers got drunk and picked out out a whole bunch of ‘stuff’ and slapped it together.
    On another note…. I have ‘finger toes’. I am picky about my shoes because I get foot cleavage. Does this make me special… or weird…
    yup, thought so…. just weird….


  2. Marsha says:

    We just had “mismatch” day at the high school I teach at. These ensembles look like what my students wore after getting dressed in the dark.

    And of course, when you’re 6 feet tall, you’re going to have long toes. Long, freaky toes that look about the same length as a normal person’s fingers. I’m getting creeped out–is it Halloween already?

    So I guess that’s my Scarlett reference: “What Scarlett O’Hara is Wearing for Halloween.”


  3. mrsmole says:

    Look Honey, I just whipped these up from the Bargain Bin at the local Home Dec fabric shop…can’t believe the fringes were so cheap…in fact I had enough to use some on every garment. Also can’t believe how great my gladiator (thanks Russell Crowe) sandals looked with every outfit! Sleeves? No, I decided my long spindly arms look better just hanging out from the armholes, cape-style and the sleeves look better as a decoration.


    • I am just glad that the fringes didnt get caught on a passing models Crowe booties and cause a massive spindly pile up of models! That pile of fringly mess would have started a housecat stampede! Michael Korrs and his mother could have been crushed!


  4. I never thought I would see Elizabethan hanging sleeves!
    I think the sewist was rubbish at set in sleeves. See the third photo. either they didn’t compensate for wide shoulders in the drafting or they just stuck the sleeves in all twisty…see her right sleeve/
    so anyway they decided to go with partially sewn and the arms sticking out.
    I don’t get the fringe/workman jackets and glittery art deco fish scale effect fabric glimpses.
    Sandy in the UK


  5. sewbussted says:

    If I had only known that an interesting sleeve treatment could be so easy, just open the side seams and let the sleeves hang free. Wow, could have saved myself a lot of work!!
    As always, fun post:)


  6. Okay, I can’t believe I’m not the only one who thought of Carol Burnett in “Went with the Wind….”

    And seriously, Anne…”multiple snack pockets?” This is why you are my favorite funny lady (after Carol, of course)!


  7. I like the outfit in the 4th picture (did I count right?) the one with the pale blue top. I couldn’t wear the open nearly to the waist look but I think I see buttons? I’d have to button a couple more of those but otherwise I want the whole thing boots and all.

    The rest, just draperies, but I’m afraid I can’t come up with an amusing Scarlett O’hara comment right now. Perhaps after a little more caffeine.


  8. The only theme I can come up with here is psychotic timewarp gypsy. Seriously, most of this stuff looks like it came straight out of the salvation army–and not all of it from the clothing section. Ick!


  9. I suspect there is a cat plot afoot here. My husband shared an instructional video for cats on how to take their human for a walk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z5rXLZfsJT0&feature=related
    I am suspecting that the designers started a few line drawings for the collection and then this very intelligent cat came to check up on his human and while the cat liked the lines, thought it needed an overhaul. There was clearly not enough entertainment built into the collection but was easily fixed by adding upholstry fringe to everything and shiny buckles that would reflect light where fringe would not work.


    • Aha! Altazurra is actually La Lagerfelds cat, so moved by the diet coke and massive inspiration surrounding her that she has rented her own loft and started a line of her own! Expect a salmon and catnip cologne called Chat #5 this spring!


  10. My dad used to love suits because of the pockets. He always exclaimed ‘look at all these pockets’. He smoked a lots back the so ot fitted his smoking habit. I think if I’d worn this ensemble he would have admired this a lot.
    As for the rest, it looks like an upholstery trying to break into women’s fashion. You know the ones with an over supply of notions and a taste for a Surrey with a fringe on top – Oklahoma style. I’m thinking Hugh Jackman, not Russel Crowe.


  11. I’m going to be completely non-snarky. I loved this collection! The green fringe dress I would totally wear. Impractical, but it’s definitely one-of-a-kind and I love being the only one I know wearing what I’m wearing. And I’d love a workman’s jacket and one of those ivory ones. Lots to like here! It seems that mis-matched is a 21st century trend. Or maybe the catwalks decided to go along with the way the masses dress anyways. After all, gotta sell the stuff.


  12. =) snack pockets are the best. (except in the movie napoleon dynamite when he has the tater tots in his pocket and they get smashed) and i think there might be an underlying “cat fancy” theme – the fringe, the fish scales, upholstery fabric (which cats love to get their claws on)


  13. csfont says:

    Drapes gone wild…! Definitely channeling Carol Burnett’s GWTW spoof! Made me think immediately of someone snatching down the valence and drapes and wrapping them into a dress…in the first case, around the waist (because don’t we all just LOVE extra bulk around the waist and hips???!!)

    The gladiator boots…sorry, SO freakin’ over these I can’t stand it. Also the toe-less boots…WHY?! I have a novel idea, fashion designers…let’s make the fashion FLATTER the figure rather than totally take it over, wear it down and make it look like a costume gone wrong…!

    Just sayin.


  14. nicebuttsdrivemenuts says:

    I agree that separately most of the pieces are really nice. It seems to be a styling-for-the-runway issue. It reminded me of the kids making playclothes out of the curtains in Sound of Music. “I am 16 going on 17” layers… And the gladiator boot trend came and went (again) like six years ago, didn’t it? The boots remind me of that early ’90s Versayce collection, except he had the deceny to close the toes so we couldn’t see actual toes. Short or long, toes are always a tough sell… I like the pirate-y mermaid-y feel to it, and I love mishmashed pieces or even prints, but this collection is something even a Goonie would pass up on. One-Eyed Willie, maybe.


  15. Is there life beyond the fringe? The green looks like dressing up box day, should be worn by an eight year old with Mummy’s court shoes and granny’s flowery hat.


  16. csfont says:

    Your blogs are always so well done, but I LOVE your Wearable Wednesdays! Such fun! I’ve added your great blog to my fav links on my new blog: windows2wearables.com (I’m inching my way into apparel sewing…quite different from valences – and apparently using a staple gun is considered inappropriate!) Keep up the great writing – and sewing!


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