Today I’m going to be that person on pattern review that I just hate. I love getting new patterns then checking out what others have done with it on PR or Flickr. Except, when I really need to know what some Big4 craziness really looks like without all the editing, photoshop, weird poses, smoke, mirrors and palm trees. Like this one: 
Wanda, I love your cruiseship handbag. I do. But it is distracting me from noticing that you have marsupial pockets. Oh, you meant to do that.
So I haunt PR looking for people who have dove in before me and tried out a new pattern. Then I see that someone has altered the snot out of something so much that it is barely the same pattern and no help at all.
I did that. I customized this badboy like a fancy lowrider. 
I know sweetie, but I was really thinking more along the lines of a fancy altered car. Sorry. By the way, that is Liesls ‘ thinking’ pose. 
OK, so I am loving my new dress- I tried to get out of my print rut and try something different and I was worried at first that it has a little housecoat feel, but I think adding the little tucks at the neckline and the buttons and tapering the waist in a bit helped that. Do you think? I am still weirded out by this pocket placement- it feels clumsy or like a very low set hoodie. Ah. Lowrider pockets. How on theme!
The front tucks started as a fix to the gappy neckline that resulted from little me thinking a center front seam just had no purpose and distorted my adorable par-cheesey print fabric. Then I just liked it more than the slashed neckline and kept rolling. Design option or miscalculation? You say tomato, I say tomatoe….
I used to feel great shame if the pattern didn’t look like the envelope- I took it to mean that I couldn’t follow directions. Like PR was judging me with that question on the review template. I always feel like putting in ‘No! …and I’m really, super sorry!’ Now I think it’s more about personalization.
Ok, more details. I skipped the back zip, removed the center seam, no lining, I created a neck facing once the tucks were set and oh, hey, thats all I changed. Next time I’d like to try the slightly funnel-necked version. What do you think? Is it a marsupial housedress?
Now. Lately I have read alot about blog comments seeming too kind, or just repetative and not very informative. So, let me tell you- I love some constructive thoughts, it’s a big help. On the otherhand, if you just wish to repetitively praise me, let me make this easier. Please select A, B or C and drop it in the comment both.
A- Damn, Anne- your proportions are practically willowy in this! When is Colin Firth leaving his wife for you?
B- Never have I seen such raw, gaudy talent outside of the Chanel workroom
C- Why do they not let you grace the covers of all big4 pattern envelopes? They are missing out on huge revenue.
Oh! I forgot-
D- All of the above and a german chocolate cupcake is in the mail!
photo credits: Pattern Review, google images, meadhawg. All images remain the property of their original owners.
LOL! You crack me up! Let’s go with “D!” Also- I agree, the pockets are a bit odd. Who’s going to stand around with her hands in pockets placed so low? Strange…
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You can shake hands with yourself- and that is not a euphemism….
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You look HOT HOT HOT! How do you look so damn good in shades of orange???
I would select “D” but sending a cupcake across the country is dangerous this time of year…hell the frosting would all be melted and stained on the outside of the package and if course while in the mail room it would draw ants…sorry. The pockets look like dandy pleats and so flattering! Don’t wait for Colin Firth…you have the perfect husband already!
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He is pretty swell, isn’t he?
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Definitely A, B and C. Looks great on you. Fit is wonderful. Like what you have done with the neckline. Pocket placement is a bit left of centre. Or actually Centre of left! (and right for that matter) I think it gives it a bit of a point of difference.
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I appreciate the pockets, but they lay funny if you use them- just weird impractical planning.
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Hmmm. Definitely A.
I think I’d leave out the pockets altogether. At my age, I am not in need of assistance in making my pooch look poochier, which I am guessing is what happens when you stuff those pockets. Really, what else are in-seam pockets for?
This color is awesome on you, and I do like your neck tucks. The overall silhouette is very flattering on you, and I would say you should refine the neck to your liking and call it a TNT. Make one in every color.
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I do love all the seams- so easy to alter the size and fit. The pockets are weirdly pooch cradling?!
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Awkward pun alert from the land of pouched beasties: where ordinary eutherian dresses have darts, marsupial dresses have dunnarts.
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I like it!
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I choose D, but I have a recipe for Midnight cake that’s even better than German Chocolate cake. I love the color on you and the tucks and button detail work so much better than the original slit design. I agree with Andrea and would nix the pockets – it’s just a weird placement. How is it that you always have the perfect shoes?? Did you ever buy those Dr Martens?
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The dr martens arrived and await their closeup!
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Ooh how exciting. Oh, and “A”.
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your dress looks terrific and you are so funny!
The tucks in the neckline are really cute and make the dress.
Ah, I love clothing made from woven fabric.
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God bless fabricmart!
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I like this dress. Darn it I like this pattern, but I would have put the pockets in the side seams. There! Constructive criticism!
p.s Colin Firth is leaving his wife for me and my furry boots ..
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Curses! Foiled again!
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I’ll go for D, HA! The print you have used is very groovy and I think the front tucks give it more style.
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Your dress is much better than what is on the pattern envelope because 1) you are a real person vs the model who hasn’t eaten since George Bush was the President, 2) your design enhancements have made the dress fit you and thus it is flattering and stylish vs the boring photo on the pattern envelope and 3) Colin Firth is a fool if he doesn’t see what he is missing 🙂
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I am going with D, but dammit Colin Firth is married? WTF? And if he leaves his wife it will be for me, not you, but aside from that, the dress looks great. I like the neck pleats and thought they were supposed to be there, so nice modification. The pockets actually blend in well, so not as bad as you think 🙂
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I like the dress and since I have this pattern, I was glad someone else made it and I found out about the pockets…they are strange. It’s funny you say that about the comments. They do tend to be syrupy sweet. I am guilty, too. I tend to non-informatively gush about projects I like, but don’t let people know that their dress could use some fitting adjustments, etc.
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You know, half the time I’m so impressed that someone put it all out there for us to see- I feel like I can’t think of a critical thing! Shocking, right?
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Love the dress, except for the masturbation pockets. (Sorry, I have little impulse control and just had to type that.) I guess I could have called them “Scratch the feminine itch” pockets. (Like I said, lack of impulse control.)
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Just don’t put your phone on vibrate.
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Oh, Marsha said what I was thinking! um, A…really. A. B too. I also think C No cupcake in the mail though. Too messy. Ladies, how are we ALL going to share Colin Firth? Poor man.
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D. Except I do not bake cupcakes. However, when/if/whatever when I am in your part of the continent I will make you a Banoffee Pie to die for and you will love and worship me forever. And then we will all go to the hospital and get insulin injections.
Seriously, I love what you did with the dress, but I think the pockets could go missing and no one would care.
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oooh- the happiest sugar coma ever-
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D. Because you are most deserving of the praise but sorry Crumbs isn’t shipping cupcakes across the border and I don’t bake. However, do you seriously expect us to criticize so marvelous a creation? C’mon woman, you know that ain’t happening! 🙂
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E 😉
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I’m giving you an F for damn FINE – firstly you have gone for a more fitted shaped which shows off your figure – excellent proportion ie hem length. The neck darts are actually right on trend and agree the pockets are just a strange design element.
The fabric colour is great on you however remember there is life and great fabric outside the craft section of the store
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I swear, it isn’t quilty! It’s a cotton voile from fabricmart- it just looks like a giant quilted parcheesi board!
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Wow, this dress looks phenomenal! I have the color block version on my to do list, I’m totally feeling his one!
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I want to see that!
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Hahaha! I’ll go with D minus the cupcake! I think the dress looks really pretty, as long as you don’t use the pockets for their practical purpose as I can’t imagine that would look good on anyone!
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Ill have Tabatha’s cupcake!! And thanks for the laughs as I eat my breakfast. I’ll go a,b,c plus Tabatha’s cupcake as I’ve got a sweet tooth at the moment….and to segue into a corny comment….wait for it….and that’s why I love your orangey dress! Sweet! Seriously, like you, it’s totally unique in a good way. You made it without any zips/ fastenings ( apart from the decorative buttons?) makes it even more of a score. I like the pouch pockets, it doesn’t look poofy or hoddielike to me, but is an odd detail for such a dress as this when you’d expect side seam pockets…
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Look at you gamboling around in the undergrowth.
I’ve had my eye on this pattern, i do like your neckline detail, fabric and colour choice suits you so well
Did not know of the pockets, don’t mind them, though I wouldn’t want to be rummaging around for my keys in public!
I go for A B and C you’d need to be able to perform open heart surgery in a two-man tent with a knife and fork before you’d get a cupcake from me, I am Scottish after all!
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Haha hee I choose D. The colour and fabric pattern look smashing, the cut looks ace too, hope that’s not sounding too sappy but it’s true however, the pocket placement? great if you have a sudden urge to scratch that itch. Side seam pockets for sure. Great dress.
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B! Although I’m not ruling out the others. Except the cupcake in the mail, because you’re going to have to come visit me in Paris to get one of my famous cupcakes. That dress is quite flattering on you…if you have any fabric left over you might try a wider belt as an option.
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B and C for me, I don’t know what a German chocolate cupcake is but I would send you some of my famous( in my family) chocolate cake if I thought it could survive Royal Mail shipping.
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A.B.C. I agree they pockets are pouchlike (I checked with the local kangaroos), I don’t mind them in the design but once your hands are in your pockets you look kinda… ah nervous. Nice shape on you. How about side seam pockets?
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Love the neck tucks but those pockets are a tad ‘odd’. If you have any remnants you should make Leisl a neckerchief – just her (and your!) colour. I say colour you say color……..
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Liesl would wear it well- she is quite fanciful!
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E – Excellent!! Thinking that you don’t need to work with a pattern at all…such a pretty frock .. you need to “make” your own pattern!! Colors great. I’m thinking pup is wondering if rain will ever stop so daddy can mow the darn grass!!!
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Never have I seen such raw, gaudy talent outside of the Chanel workroom
Bloggers complaining about unimaginative comments remind me of cheerleaders complaining about their long, straight, thick, blonde hair.
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It’s just so hard to find clothes to fit my perfect size 2 and don’t clash with my violet eyes, sigh…..
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You always cheer me up! Totally right to eliminate the CF seam, would have spoilt the print. Oh and I agree with Claudine!
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D!
Seriously, I like yours better than the original. I hate those slash necklines. No matter what I do one side stays up and the other flops open. The pockets? I’m not sure. They look good but I’m not sure if they would work for me. I actually put things in my pockets, mostly my smartphone, A.K.A, my other brain.
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I tried the phone in the pocket yesterday- it banged against my inner thigh in an unpleasant way. Nuff said, right?
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Definitely selection D. But also some constructive criticism: the pockets would be less noticeable if you match the pattern.
I love the neckline tucks 🙂
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A very good point! Im getting to the skill stage were Im less fearful of trying to match- i will try it next time. Thanks!
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LOL! Best post ever! Seriously, WHAT is the deal with those pockets? They don’t look bad, but I don’t really understand the point! Sometimes it feels like the good folks at McCall’s don’t know how to make a design seem unique, so they just add some stupid detail as an afterthought.
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I LIKE this dress on you and think the pockets and belt are genormously good details. Rock on…
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LOL! All of the above–except without the cupcake, I do better at baking cinnamon rolls and other breads. 😉 Sadly, I don’t think they would last long enough to get to the mail.
And those pockets are definitely weird. Not sure what they were thinking there, but then, that’s clothing designers for you. 😉
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Yes, D. Do people really complain that comments are too repetitive and/or nice? But truly, I do not think it looks like a house dress and your version def looks better than the envelope.
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hilarious post! Agreed pocket placement all wrong! I’ll say D minus the cupcake as I don’t bake!
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D!! Hee hee. I already tweeted you, but like to comment on the blogs, as well. The kangaroo pockets don’t look too shabby on this fabric! It’s when they are on the sweatshirt style fabric that they come out looking big, bulky and draw your eye to the, not the most flattering, spot.
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B. That was easy.
I’d nix the pockets – I agree…totally mindless placement! Also – and don’t hate – those neckline tucks bother the heck out of me. Is that one on the left longer than the one on the right? Tsk. That keeps drawing my eyes…even more than the marsupial pocket ridiculousness. Not even multiple distractions *SQUIRREL* can help here…sorry.
All in all, though, it’s a cute dress on you.
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Hate it say it, the tucks botheted me in most pics- Ive measured them, its my body!
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The unadulterated (don’t you love that word?) truth is that you look really cute in that summery dress with its alterations and color. Make more and lose the fabric-eating pockets next time. A winner!
Disclosure: This comment is truthful and written of my own free will.
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This dress is most definitely a winner and it looks like you totally nailed the fit! I have never in all my life seen a marsupial dressed this stylishly (and I’ve seen a lot of marsupials!). Please don’t relegate this beauty to a house dress.
I guess that also makes my answer D 🙂
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I am one proud gal with strangely placed pockets-
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Whilst this dress is totes Colin worthy I am afraid he has a previous engagement with me and my fancy new PJ pants. Rowr!
The tucks are such a cute feature- I love it!
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Maybe there is enough Firthy goodness for all-
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I read this wrongly. Now picturing Colin Firth in this dress….and I’m a bit concerned the hem would float up when he jumps in the lake. At least the marsupial pockets would help him keep his dignity if he jammed his hands in quick enough before swamped….unless the paparazzi accused them of being fumbling pockets.
Will that do? Oh ok, D.
(Shape’s nice, neckline is gorgeous, colour and pattern are fun….I’d probably stick some pockets in seam at the sides and possibly chop marsupial pockets off at seam and top stitch them closed. Love the shoes).
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So distracted by lake visuals…
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If you don’t have a back zip how do you get the dress on and still have it fitted at the bodice? Sneaky tricks?
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Im part reptile on my mothers side.
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OMG I knew it!!!
1950s just when the aliens arrived too. Gosh you’re sooo lucky.
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So now I have a song stuck in my head …. Low Rye Derr ….
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Definitely “D”, minus the cupcake. It would undoubtably be pretty stale by the time it finally got to you. This dress looks brilliant on you, make more! 😀
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Most assuredly “D”! You post is pretty damn funny! I never noticed the pockets on the pattern envelope picture. I must say I am not a fan of pockets that direct my hands to cover my area like that. I like the changes you made to the dress, mostly the tucks at the neckline. Definitely adds character.
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First, we have to stop buying all the same pieces of fabric. That, or I have to be quicker about making them up in order to beat you to the punch.
Second, love the color and pattern on you, but…I feel there needs to be some additional detail around the neckline to tell the eye where to go and to frame your gorgeous face. Not that I don’t like the dress, but perhaps food for thoughts about future dresses?
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I’ll go with D, but I’m not sure the cupcake would make it through customs. I often use tucks at the neckline as a design feature (to fix a gaping neck- I think I must have weird shoulders) but they are nightmare to get in the right place and matching. I think yours look fine though. Unfortunately I think you may get some very dodgy looks if you use those pockets for your hands – people will wonder exactly what you are doing in there.
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You write the best posts. He, He,I agree with Claudine, how dare people complain about mindlessly praiseful comments? I will be calling them Cheerleader Complainers from now on.
Um, I ate your chocolate cake,it would have been stale if I sent it, so I will have to go with B.
I don’t like side seam pockets due to increasing apparent hippiness but my favourite ever practical pocket for a casual dress is just below the hip – a darstardly Burda angled double welt pocket with a zip, but it not only is very useful but looks nicely streamlined- no marsupial dimensions either.
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GIRL! This is the best dress on you! D! I wish I could get a cupcake to you! When i was growing up, I always requested German Chocolate Cake for my birthday! Chocolate, coconut, pecans, sugar….what’s not to love?
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I totally agree, thank you!
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this only just appeared in my reader?!!
anyway, just to say D and also, that colour really suits you.
also, i thought you were a mad woman from madland for the first few pics b/c i could NOT see the pockets at all until the pic of you with your hands in them.
i think you look just fancy pants.
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I love this dress on you. I looked up the pattern on patternreview just to see what someone else recommends with the pattern and…found you. Great blog and great review. I’ll be making my dress without the pockets…
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Defnitely D – sans cupcake, as I’m not sure it’ll survive all the way from our remote corner of the globe. (Who am I kidding. I have a policy never to giveaway perfectly edible cupcakes).
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