Wearable Wednesday Gucci

Fabric, boots….purr, purr….


She’s like a surly Superhero forced to go to a cocktail party at the Justice League’s accountants house.


Ok, the lowslung pants trend officially must stop NOW>


Ok, that slit is not safe at the water cooler, but other than that- yes, indeed.


The reptiles of William Morris…


Previously unreleased pics of the Crackerjack sailor at Gastonbury-


I’m starting to warm to the snakey sundress look…..is that bad?


I just can’t-its all over the place- were these the last 5 items left on the rack by mistake?



photo credits:Style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

Wearable Wednesday, Christopher Kane by request

I wish the piping were pixie sticks- this model needs a pick me up!


I love this one. Please let there be more daisies in the bag.


Young River Phoenix looks good in this. I hope she doesn’t lose the donning instructions- it looks complicated.


Why won’t you take my ideas seriously, Mr Smith? I kept raising my hand during the meeting!


The Project Runway astro turf nightie challenge winner!


Sesame Place unsuccessfully  tries to add some ‘street’ to their parade dancers this summer.


Christopher Kane, now in non-stick.


Becky, the demure call girl.


Beckys madam.


Optical illusion or are her arms that freakin’ skinny???Send help and carbs!


Ok, I like this one and it’s so secure!


My head! It’s too much!

1- Sometimes you just need a good airing.

2- Insert Model here (instructions for backstage dressers)

3- …..no. Thats too filthy to type. My Father reads this.


Chris- I’d watch out for Betsey Johnson, she’s probably behind you….


More Kane?

photo credits:Style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

Summer and Mccalls 6554

When does summer end for you? When  the temperature changes? When the ads change to pencils and bookbags? When your co-worker announced that in mid-july it’s time to start thinking about her fall porch display? Summer in South Carolina can be so confusing. The stores are showing you cardigans and you are melting at the thought. This is another reason I love to sew my wardrobe. I control my sleeve length destiny.


This week it’s totally sans sleeves. I am touring in my 2nd Summer Sundress Sew-along entry!


This is my new favorite summer dress. Did I say that last time?  Ok, don’t tell my other dress it just got demoted for Mccalls 6554!This has been hanging around waiting for its textile soulmate longer than most patterns. I hope it’s happy now- I am. I found the base fabric at Mary Jo’s. The stretch lace on the bodice is from fabric.com.  I have since used it on 2 more embellishment victims and they all seem happy too.  Look at me doing my own stunts with my new friend! Huh….I just read that sign while editing and probably shouldn’t be letting that donkey gently maul me….well, hmm.look1

I followed instructions to  fully line the bodice- with my lace needing a backing it was getting pretty heavy already for a summer dress, so next time I will draw out a neck facing by hand. Something I used to do alot for doll clothes. They got so bulky with too many layers on such a small shape. Except Barbie of course, she demanded full shantung linings. I do wish I’d lined the lace with something besides the body fabric. I can sort of see the design showing thru. Not a total deal breaker, but not my favorite thing- having a magic eye illusion on my torso.


Oh, self belt/sash, you know I do not care for you, lets just leave it at that. You didn’t get invited to this Valerie Wells Karavan party. Sorry, baby. I wore this to work last week, now it’s going to a craft brew and such dinner with the Mr B. He likes this dress  even more than I do. Funny how people see things differently on you than you do- I think it’s very bulking looking in the skirt, but he thinks it’s very flattering, God love this man.


By the by, this is not a petting zoo. It is the local legal moonshine purveyor closed on sundays. It has goats on the roof, too, but they were disdaining  my endeavours. Not like Florence, here. We are bosom chums now. Just like Zac Posen and Coca Rocha!


photo credits: pattern review, meadhawg, google images. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wendesday Jonathan Simkhai

Time for a game I think of as “Yuck and Yes!” Ready?

Yuck and a why?


yes and a mental review of my pattern stash.


Yuck and a head shake.


yes and a hmm….are those her hipbones?


yuck and a scowl (from her and I both)


yes and a monitor lick!


Your turn- now please preface it with a ‘YUCK’ or a ‘YES’ and your special feelings :


1 more:


photo credits:Style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

So I entered a Contest


I don’t normally do contests. They bring out the poor put upon martyr 8th grader that lurks beneath my well- polished facade of maturity. I like a swap, I like a sew along, oh please  DON’T JUDGE ME!!!! maybe a Pattern Review event like the Pattern Stash  Contest would be more like a personal challenge and I can handle those, since I routinely lie to myself about my snack consumption, stash purchase and pattern buying, something on paper documented would be easier to admit to!


So here we go- my 3rd on my list- Butterick 5812. It’s been sitting in the bin for-evah. I’ve had a million ideas for it- including just using the slip to make…slips! Looking at this picture, again- a pattern that does not scream at you to buy and run home to muslin. salmon under turquise lace? Really? Is that what you thought would sell it, Betty Butterick?


But look at the line drawing- view A looks like it could be fun, doesn’t it? View D- also interesting.  Being blazing summer in the south, I started with B.


According to Pattern Review, 14 members own this and 9 want it. Hmm- whats keeping you people? Has Jo Ann’s back ordered your salmon duchess satin? Well, once more I cut the ribbon on a new gaudy classic. I will keep an eye on this. Next week the ‘owned’ number may drop substantially as sewists jettison this load from their queues due to my tasteful use of it!


I’ve loved these 2 fabrics I used for so long- but never thought of all of them forming a gaudy trinity with this pattern until recently.  I did the slip in a flocked gauze- in a color that I was worried about being close to my face- I thought the liver function testing would be recommended if I did, so I brought out this black, teal, Chartreuse and white (phew!) crinkle sheer would cover that a bit and work well together as a foil for it. Once I got it to the alterations portion of our fun, I realized the underskirt barely showed and that seaweedy flocking was hiding too much. I think it’s darn cute, even if it makes me Princess Sallowcheeks.


So Ms Holloway bravely stood still while I scooped out the neckline and angled the hem to show more seaweed. Yes, ladies, if your hem gets too high, gentlemen will see your seaweed. A cautionary tale, I bring to you. Now I’ve just edited this post to include a pic that shows the right sleeve better- it looks like a little puff in the other pictures- I can’t explain why- I assume it is just my powerful right bicep from flipping thru Vanity Fair magazine every month while holding an extra large slurpee aloft to keep condensation off the pages.



Now I’m very happy, my only issue is that it is a little less stable in the neckline now. I plan more of these so I will narrow the back a bit more toward the top as I do the front. That front alteration got lost in my scoopadge. I have those slopey shoulders that would have made Prince Albert quite randy, I’m sure. ds5

Ahem…vote for me!


photo credits: pattern review, google images, meadhawg. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Erin Fetherston

Let me just say that I am prepared to hate this- everytime I see this designer she looks so ‘Berghdorf Blonde’ that I want to smoosh her. I will of course keep the  blessed neutrality that makes me the mature blogger that you all respect so. Yup.

Meh. No, no,stop it.  I like the print. Its ok.


Don’t try to entice me with  a book! This is nice. Its femmy but not over the top.


Evita- the clerical years.


Really? She’s just phoning it in with this one.


Ok, ok, that was harsh. Deep breathes Anne, think WWAHD. What would Audrey Hepburn do…….But this next one is like a Junior Miss lampshade. Who can wear this???


This is awful. Does she hate this model? She looks like a potato wrapped in shelf paper.


Strawberry Shortcake at Wimbledon taken quite  literally.


Dammit. I like this one. Just don’t try to sit near me in the cafeteria Erin, or we’ll have to tussle.



photo credits:Style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

I am so far behind I can mock my own panty lines!

While tooling about on Pattern Review I just realized I have 5 makes that I haven’t posted. 5! That’s one less than a Brady Bunch but more than Abba! It’s unbelievable! Ok, let me gather my pups and get my lip rouge on.
First up:

Butterick 5999- it’s a Connie Crawford and I swear, I’ve made so many things with this model on the envelope- I feel she is looking directly at me- ‘Hey tacky- this ones for you!’ I must share that we blew the location shoot budget this week on penny candy and fireworks. The Mr was cleaning the garage- ok, re-ordering his crap, actually, so I snuck in some gorgeous garage location shots- ala Thelma Todd! Look it up kiddies!
In the summer I am all about some Capri pants, ballet flats and a swingy top. This print was earmarked to be a flowing skirt, but I got to thinking about that wide pleat on the bodice front and how fun this tropical floral would look peeking out- like a kids picture book with 3D images. Look it’s a Mona Loa! No it’s just Anne in her usual foolishness!

One thing- I hate the sleeve length- they are just too long to be short sleeves, but too short to be below the elbow. So I was rolling them up to see where I liked them and actually ended up liking them with a rolled cuff. Note to self! Re-hem with a cuff! Here’s a little detail of my dragonfly fun on the placket- you know I can’t leave a thing alone?! Dog hair- I swear- I have a Velcro bosom?!


Simplicity 1363- someone needs to talk to these Big4 companies that woo me with patterns on display that don’t have the actual catalog numbers. I know you are trying to track the impulse buying sheep that I graze with (Bahhhh, BAHHHHHH!) but give me a break- those numbers are never corresponding to the Pattern Review info. Also- way to be subtle. Simplicity is 1363, my copy says P0163
But I forgive, because we fat people are jolly forgiving souls. But like elephants, we never forget!!!
Anyhoo, I totally got side tracked up here on my paisley velvet upholstered soap box. I’m loving this top. It’s swishy, but not tenty. I like to swish, but I don’t like tent. I did view D with a micro gingham contrast material partnering a Valerie Wells lawn- both from Mary Jo’s in Gastonia. Last trip up there I brought my swatch book and swore I would buy nothing that didn’t partner an already adopted fabric. So it was stash busting preemptively, I suppose. The shovel was an attempt at an action shot and a shout out to Eddie Albert, of course.


I had to show off my creamy elbow skin the side detail- it’s what drew me to the pattern. That lawn had not seen the light in almost a year and now I have a lovely top and enough left of both to do something else. No idea hit me while I was cutting, so it will return to the closet to commune with the other lovelies. I failed to do my standard narrowing of the neckline and had to cheat with a decorative pleat.  Neckline close up:


Oh, lets keep up my 2 hits and a miss theme with 1 more top! Ladies, it is less sleek on the hippish- be warned.


It’s the Victory Patterns Roxanne and Surprise! It’s not a miss! I love it. I’ve been harboring this printed eyelet way too long, I think it found its best friend.
What do I like about this? Its floaty, it’s still slightly angled so it isn’t just a pretty sack, and this collar is precious.


Yes, I succumbed to preciousness! Sadly, my eyelet totally wilted in the heat of the garage and the photoboy was paying as much attention as he should to the twists and turns of my neckline. So slack!! Very happy the kayak didn’t fall on me!

Now I know you all have buses to catch and schemes to hatch but Ive saved my last bit of special for, well….last.

Bea? Bea if you are out there, wave a dainty hand and acknowledge your fabness! My Swappy partner for Kestral’s annual swap was totally channeling little me! I always worry that I will partner with a beigy babe andI will be the one tearfully reading a thoughtful note with ‘….I notice that you are lacking good sensible staple pieces- here is some khaki broadcloth….’
Luckilly Bea and The Kestral knew best! Follow me on my zipper-strewn path to gaudy joy:






Final Big Squeal!!!



photo credits: meadhawg, pattern review. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Eudon Choi


Look at them. Suffering. Have you laid awake nights, worrying about professional models and the horrors they endure at the hands of demented professional designers? Yes, me too. I feel their shame.


Do their families know where they are and how they make their living? Do they fear they will be abandoned if what they do is made known to their parents?


It’s not their fault. Lets band together and lure them into Diet Coke baited model traps and liberate them somewhere safe.


Now for the low-cost of $5 a month, you can sponsor a former model and give them a better life. This includes a full meal and a comfortable Hanes sweat suit in an adult size. Also a voucher for a much-needed assessment by a licensed podiatrist.


With a simple tax deductible donation, you can bring hope to the eyes of a runway model- show them you care- show them lined fabrics and a better life!


No one should have to live this way. It’s just wrong.


photo credits:Style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.