Month: August 2017

Wearable Wednesday Vetements

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Ugh- if I have to look- so do you!

She’s begging for a bicycle to knock her out of this outfit!

Are her feet that big or is a clown hiding behind her?

I think of this pose as ‘pouting with cramps’

Does she have a spare outfit in the bag under her  arm? We’ll wait while she changes….

You have to perfect a sexy bowlegged walk to keep the boot squeaking to a minimum. Life lessons. I give them.

First glance I really thought her leg was swung over the dumpster and I kind of understood why. 

This feels random. 

I highly recommend that you go see the rest of this collection. Not for fashion inspiration, but for amusing street style what the f’ery. Exhibit A:

Photo credits: vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday Chalayan

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I was going to say that this collection has no hanger appeal, but the hanger loved this one so much it refused to leave-

This is classic comedy move #453- the frisky gerbil in the pant leg at a fancy event! It’s gold!

Dita Von Teese and all the burlesque angels couldn’t make this combo happen-

When you are still nursing, but also planning a hostile takeover of Acme Carborundum at noon!

I need to know what the front is doing- but maybe I don’t. 

First glance, I thought she still had the makeup bib on-

This is my ‘get your soccer ball and your juice boxes off my GD lawn you little bastards!’ Outfit:

I don’t think Helenes arm is really sprained- she just didn’t want to wear the black dress.

Jokes on you Helene!

Photo credits: vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday LemLem

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Sigh….I couldn’t keep the guys away when I wore this on holiday at Sandals… it’s not getting as much love at Ladies night at Applebee’s.

Is it called resort wear because wearing it is a last resort on laundry day?

Can we stop trying to make these pants a thing? They make most of us look like General Froggie in his dress whites. 

Project Runway placemat challenge!

Siri- remind me to buy pillow cases for the guest room.

Valances are in aisle 4, just past the salad spinners-

Too much ambien and Estelle woke up naked in Senor Vallejos Casa de Pampas…..again.

Photo credits: vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday House of Holland

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I’m

Seeing a lot of musical influences here- the Partridge family bus-


Elton Johns Bar Mitzvah outfit-

I swear I saw Chastity Bono wear this on her parents show!

I’m sorry- Miley in her lowest rave moment rejected this-

Isnt a corduroy sundress kind of counter productive?

Look- the old green room couch from CBGBs!

The masseuse backstage at Coachella looks a bit put out. 

Photo credits: vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday Molly Goddard

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More like Moldy Goddamn-


Do you make a POPPET Goody Proctor?????


Walk of Shame- Granny’s rumpus room edition:

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain-

I like watching the puddles gather raaaaaiiiiiinnnn!

I like the ‘insert bewbs here’ dotted lines. Blouses can be so challenging.

Last year during a TCM scavenger hunt, Rita successfully hid in Doris Days powder room for 4 hours!

Childhood therapy inducing flashback #973- nothing took me out of Halloween princess zone like having to wear a sensible coat while trick or treating. Sigh. 

Louise! Finish inflating your frock- the car is here!

At least her shoes match her- oh, just forget it. I’m out. 

Let’s thank Mary Pat for powering the entire venue with her solar paneled dress. Take a bow and have some aloe, Ma’am! 


Photo credits: Cogue.com