The last description I ever want to hear about my upper torso is ‘flappy, droopy and empty’….
There’s probably a hilarious story about the models feeding persimmon jam to some emus and then a stampede occurred and oh, well, you can imagine….
‘Finkle, party of 4? Welcome to O’Chans. The fitst Scottish Mandarin tapas buffet. Follow me to your table….’
Prince Valiant got really experimental during his gap year in Brussels. 
Eleanor knew how to hurt Vinnie- she stole his vintage seat covers and wore them on a date with a guy in a Kia.
A fox Jean jacket…oh no.
Is her shirt caught on her- oh I just have no excuse for it at all.
What is with these breastal coin nurses??? 
Scar face bedroom curtain homage-
Just tuck it in enough so she doesn’t trip- it’s fine, looks fine. 
Yeah, you should look sheepish Boyo!?
Photo credits: vogue.com
Pretty Grievances 
Obviously this man has never met a real woman to ask what she feels good in…so he just made up this shit. The clothes are as sad as his models. When in doubt, wrap a dead animal around your shoulders and tuck some money in your titty purse for an emergency.
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Never leave home without cab fare in your…no. Nobody’s mother endorsed that.
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I can’t help but notice that HIS pockets are in practical places??? But they are probably not pockets at all. The real ones are upside down on the back on the yoke.
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Just ridiculous- who ever looked at Grandpas fishing vest with covetous intent!?
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How did that last guy get in there? He looks… normal. And the look on his face? It says, “Try and throw me out. Go ahead, I dare you.”
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I just feel like if sex offenders have to make their presence known- so should Scary designers!
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What’s with the comb-over hair style on some of the models? Maybe the models needed comb-overs to give them headaches so they wouldn’t notice what they’re wearing.
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Then there’s the audience member wearing one of grandma’s crocheted couch afghans…
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I’ve never wanted them to pan the audience as much as when I saw that!
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“O’Chans”…perfect!
To put this ‘fashion show’ into perspective…this guy actually PLANNED, CHOSE FABRICS and THOUGHT about this collection for (weeks? days? hours?) and THIS is what he put down the runway. GAWD. Just give the fabric allowance to some REAL sewists…please!
I’m convinced that the audience is composed of captive fashion students getting credit for class…I mean, who else would sit through this?!
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I think he’s taking money from the pocket lobbyists!
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The boobbags are just unacceptable. I’m all for conceptual fashion, but that is just insulting.
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They do look like used airbags. Another reference to my torso that would offend me!
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Used airbags? Definitely, a tragedy occurred here. There should be jail time for butchering awesome fabric.
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Hmm, I kind of like the Scottish mandarin dress—-the side angles could be really flattering and I like the broad stripe across the clavicle with the button details. Now, we need to seriously talk about that one dress that looks like she just tucked a bunch of fabrics from the clearance bin around her body….that is sheer patheticness. Just pitiable.
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See that blonde lady sitting in the audience, on the left, last model picture? She feels like I do.
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So, his jacket is the most reasonable of the lot? The feather duster godets are a little terrifying. If you can clean your floors with the skirt you’re currently wearing, that’s probably not a good thing.
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