Wearable Wednesday Roberto Cavalli


Please pull the ripcord and let the model reinflate.

Susan Dey was last seen leaving a Benedict Canyon motor lodge in this outfit. Papparrazzi are quite excited about this dress and the many starlets trying to get out of their cars drunk. This is like a Buck Rodgers villain evening dress- Ming the Mercillous has 3 on order.

I don’t know what’s going on here, but you’re in a cult- call your Dad.Lace and Snakes was the worst reptile and craft store idea ever. Never could get business insurance. well, it does look comfortable. Photo credits: Vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday Roberto Cavalli


I think Kate Hudson divorced a guy for wearing this-


Did you know there was one more Von Trapp child? His cross dressing was a bit of an issue for the Baron….

Once more I must elude to the vile and sundry things I’d do to possess this jacket- filthy shameful things! But not for the skirt- I can’t handle visible pocket bags.

This evening on the 2nd biggest stage of the Pocono Lodge- its Verna and her blazing ukulele mashups of the Carpenters and Marilyn Manson! 2 nights only!!!

My thighs are so chilly, yet my legs are clammy with sweat. High fashion or malaria? It’s all about perspective.

I have binned dresses that bloused like this- and my standards for flattering shapes are pretty low.

Oh- oh, yes, pretty one! Come to Annie! I don’t even mind your collarbone harness!

The Project Runway cupcake liner challenge!


A raincoat with suede boots- it’s like a dry clean only swimsuit….

Photo credits- vogue.com

Wearable Wednesday Roberto Cavalli


Ahh…she should look happier than this. Is it because everyone assumes she’s the lost Fanning sister? ro2

ooh…its the shoes. They are hurting their feelings. They are giving this depressed girl the oddest stance- like she’s having balance issues. For the record, I would like to state that this may be too much animal print. I said, MAY BE…..r1

hmm…this is no longer working for me.ro3

Ok, it’s taken me 3 pictures to realize that I was just sucked in by animal prints and am not really inspired by the shapes at all. Lets lose the color and see how we feel. Usually the cut and line of a designers work is my favorite part. Oh, that and the obviously suffering of the models. ro4

ro5

Ok, its all about the fabrics for me. There are some wonderful textural layers and such happening here, but the shapes are kind of basic. The white pairings sort of reminded me of Spiegel catalog in the 1980’s. ro6

Anyone for a little boho-age? This styling is quite limp.ro7

The details are lovely- I want to touch these, but not the shoes- they look othopaedically torturous! ro8

The above skirt is like that Project Runway Dylans Candy Bar challenge- is it licorice? I hope so. I think I’d love to have some of these pieces to throw on with jeans and feel quite fancy- they’d definitely get some admiring stares, but all together, I feel like a bunch of quilts and doilies mated behind Grandmas back. Please people, spay and neuter your linens!!!ro9

photo credits: Vogue UK, all photos remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Roberto Cavalli …What do you see?


Sew Ruth? I need you to focus here, we have pants options for you! You can stop worrying about the needle holes- this is going to camouflage it with cat shreddiness.  We also have a new distraction from non-functional sheers- watercolor Pink Floyd prints! I like  a lot of this collection in theory, altho it seems to be 4 basic pieces in several color themes. Come on Roberto, just line these and I’d be happy. The first picture has so much visible from the outside that I think I see her inner thigh nicotine patch?! So now I’d like you all to relax and clear your minds. We’re going to play a game. Hopefully the FBI isn’t monitoring this blog- we’re going to all say the first thing that we see when we look into the 2013 RTW textiles of Roberto Cavalli. Ready? hmm- did anyone say ‘Squid Foreplay?’ Me too! Alright go ahead, try it! Nipples is too easy- try again! Does anyone know how to tuck sheer into sheer without looking like you are wearing bicycle shorts?Cheetah mantis anarchy! hmm- your turn! Alien Monarch Boobs! Which is also my stage name, when I rap. 

photo credits: style.com