Wearable Wednesday Stella Jean


Ok, I know I have questionable taste- but can I have each of these pieces for my Russian peasant Southwest Cossack party?

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Security photo taken right before Angela was arrested leaving Pottery Barn:

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Little Cyndi Lauper was asked to leave St Bartholin’s girls choir, but she knew one day they’d all be sorry.

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Why…..WHY do I not have a tassel sample skirt?????

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Are her feet in quarentine? It takes a very unattractive shoe to distract from a gilded monkey fetus dickie. Yes, yes it does.

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Look! her tie is tie-dyed…or is it her tye is tie-died or tied-died or….aw, screw it- look at the batik clown suit !

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Agnes was only a pilgrim in the Thanksgiving pageant under protest. But I think the administration knew she was trying to send a message.

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Behold! I am your High Priestess of the Arts and Crafts Aisle! Anoint me with puffy paint and throw googly eyes at my feet, slaves!

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Loewe


Erin was so worried about dropping her hanky and breaking a rib in the retrieval process that she tied on some spares. Clever girl!

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They say dress for the job you want- Wanda picked gladiator.

l2

Lois found the cat ashtray she’d made her step mom for mothers day in the bin behind the pool house. She didn’t say anything, but clearly she gave a message.

l3

Huh, not all boucle is classy.

l5

One more ‘is that you tinkling’ joke and I’m gonna bust some asses, she thought.

l7

Not so much Klimt- more like Clumpt.

l8

Alice spent the morning being backcombed offstage by members of the official Wool council representatives.

l4

Do modelling contracts include chafing hazard pay?

l9

photo credits: style.com. All images are the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Simone Rocha


You ordered the haunting? Where do you want me?

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Gees, Helene, just admit you need help with the zipper, don’t be such a baby!

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I think the bust cups make it super sexy, don’t you?

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Yes, Becky, it kind of DOES matter which piece you put on first, I thought you were a professional.

s7

Um, whats with the bewb wickets?  Come on google search, don’t leave me hanging!

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Is she holding her spleen in? Or keeping it from unravelling further?

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This is why you don’t ring RuPauls doorbell before noon.

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photo credits: style.com. All images are the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Bernhard Willhelm


They say if you see her before bedtime- you will be in constant torment no matter how much Nexium you swallow. .

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Arthur knew he’d never be a policeman, but he would be the best traffic cone he could be!

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Mom, this is Othello- we’re in love! He’s an artiste!

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Eric didn’t like to be a complainer, but it seemed clear that the costume store didn’t know a damn thing about Iron Man.

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Lucy, maybe you can explain why all the bathmats are missing from dorm 12….hmm?

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A secret order of Ronin warriors who follow Debbie Harry around an keep her safe.

 

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5 seconds: List a place you shouldn’t go dressed like this:

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of the original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Dolce & Gabbana



I feel an unfortunate theme coming on. 

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Would an apple a day keep this dress away?

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Well, Alannah, we told you to wear something under it- it’s obviously made of kitchen scrubbies!

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Haha, very funny, yes my name is Crystal and this is a chandelier, soooo funny.

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The Sydney Lanier middle school band lost its best majorette when Sally altered her uniform without permission.

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I can see Phyllis Diller threatening the maid while wearing this.

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Are those frog prince lapel details? Be still my immature heart!

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Oh, no, I’m not trying to be rude- I was just trying to read your crotch….don’t hit me with the Popes incense burner!!!

dg3

Never before- and I researched it- has anyone every said, ‘You look like a geriatric discoball’.

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An unnamed sultan offered this model $5 million to rub him all over in this outfit while singing ‘tiny bubbles’.

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I WILL be buried in this.

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Photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Bridal Edition!


Pauline Johnson, cotton ball heiress honors her family fortune with a little Oscar de la Renta.

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Oh Howard, I’m so excited to be your wido- err, bride! (Naeem Khan)

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Elinors mother was mortified when  she dropped to the floor to count the checks after the cake cutting. (Elie Saab)

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The minister was vaguelly distracted by Mimi’s hypno-crotch. (christian Siriano)

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Wanda wasn’t ashamed about needing to breast feed during her vows.(Temperly)

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Edwina popped out to get married in this Carolina Herrera between her shifts hostessing at the Blintz Buffet.

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Mollie found the perfect way to honor meeting Bernard in the lightshade shop 4 years ago! (houghton)

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No, Edna, I said atellier, not aviary?! (christian Siriano)

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It’s ok, Sweetie- we’ll photoshop a groom in later! (Elie Saab)

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On a budget, it was dress or reception, so Nancy opted to be her own discoball. (Naeem Khan)

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Trust me, Ruth- I harbor no bad feelings about you and Brian and I’d love to bring your dress to the church for you on saturday! (houghton)

h1

Grannie Phillips broke her hip sprinting down the aisle to place a strategic doily on Lilys crotch pagoda by Marchesa.

mar1 Ever the control freak, Erin was afraid Javier would forget his one line when he saw her in her Elie Saab.

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Face first in the cake, Alison? (Houghton)

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photo credits: style.com, WWD. All images remain the property of their original owners.

Wearable Wednesday Pushbutton


Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear.  A Bear with a low self image who not so secretly wore a slenderizing corset and only ate honey at home alone with the blinds drawn.

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Grannie was very upset when she arrived at the Catskills and found her favorite evening suit missing- but she refused to ever wear it again.

9p

Eric closed his eyes and desperately tried to contact his inner pirate poet.

5p

Laura knew there would be big changes to the pit crew once Crash’s widow took over- but she didn’t expect it to involve new uniforms.

7p

After recutting the sleeves 10 times to satisfy the designer, Wanda was just able to squeeze out a matching breech cloth.

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Gregory prided himself on the knowledge that the other secretaries thought of him as one of the girls.

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Damn it, Chloe- you were supposed to be helping Fleur with her top- we are in so much trouble!

8p

Sadly, by the time Edna reached the end of the catwalk she was one giant lightening rod of static cling.

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photo credits: style.com. All images remain the property of their original owners.